Category Archives: General Topic

Botox for Bridesmaids

Posted on by

I read the NY Times regularly, for their in-depth coverage of the news.  And from time to time the Times publishes feature articles about cultural trends–mainly in Manhattan, and mainly among the rich, it seems.

I have read about parents who spend $25,000 on their 6-year-old’s birthday party.  I have seen an article about women who are having foot surgery so they can wear the latest Jimmy Choo creations.  I know that some 12-year-olds have their own interior decorators.  And now an article appears about the demands that some brides are making on the attendants at their weddings (7/24, p. E3).

A Ms. Knauer, 35-year-old owner of a staffing agency in Manhattan, is offering “cosmetic interventions” for those in her bridal party, including her mother and future mother-in-law.  Each woman will receive a facial assessment by an “aesthetician” and will be able to go forward with a treatment plan before the December wedding.

No longer is it enough for a bridesmaid to get her hair done by a stylist and wear a ridiculous-looking dress that will never see the light of day again, but now some brides are “gifting” their attendants with dermal fillers and tooth-whitening.

Another bride went a step–no, several steps–further when she told her attendants that she had found a doctor in L.A. who was willing to do four breast augmentation operations for the price of two, and she would like them to go under the knife.  One of her attendants, Becky Lee, commented, “We’re all Asian and didn’t have a whole lot of cleavage.”  Ms. Lee felt that the bride’s request was excessive and opted for a push-up bra. 

But such bizarre requests apparently are not confined to New York alone.  Two weeks ago, a company called Health Travel Guides exhibited for the first time at a Dallas Bridal Show.  “We received 30 requests for quotes among the bridal show attendees–mostly for plastic surgery such as liposuction and breast augmentation,” said Sandra Miller, the company’s representative. 

Texas, I can understand.  Like New York, Texas has some folks who have more money than good sense.  But New Jersey?  A Ms. Goldberg tactfully broke the news to her mother-in-law-to-be that her son’s chosen one would like her to get rid of the crow’s feet marring her face before the Big Day.

All I can is that if my son’s beloved asked me to do that, I would take my son aside and have a heart-to-heart talk with him.  I would say, “Son, I feel obliged as a mother to warn you.  I will say this only once.  You’re about to marry a woman who doesn’t like herself the way she is, and never will.  She is a woman who will spend the household money foolishly.  She may never want to have children, because of course the little tikes are demanding and do some damage to a woman’s girlish figure.  She may spend more time staring in the mirror than looking at you.  I cannot tell you who to marry or not to marry, and I will of course support you, and your bride, whatever you decide to do.  But know what you’re getting into.”

And a final word now for brides to be, and women in general.  You will get old, unless you die young.  Eventually, no matter how many skin treatments you get, you will die.  You will not be remembered for your smooth, unwrinkled face and your big breasts.  You will be remembered, or not, for your capacity to love, for how completely you can give yourself to something beyond yourself. 

And you can put your money on that.  

 

Living in the Moment

Posted on by

I’m traveling to Portugal for a few weeks this summer, and just about every day someone asks me, with a big smile, “Are you excited about your trip?”

I must confess that I am not–excited, I mean.  I am preparing for the trip, I am glad for the opportunity, I am thankful that I have the resources of time and money.  But “excited” has too much of the anticipatory, too much heaviness of expectation, laden upon it.  I have learned that no experience–whether it is one that I seek or one that I fear– is ever what I imagine it to be.  And my idea of what that experience should be, or could be, or might be, will often prevent my awareness, in the moment, of the experience itself.

As a minister, I deal with life and death matters–and not just theoretically, in words, from the pulpit.  Just a few weeks ago, a man greeted me warmly as he has done for years, when he left the sanctuary after the Sunday service.  A week later he was diagnosed with an inoperable cancer.  A week after that, he was dead.  Just today I learned of the recurrence of a breast cancer in one of my congregants, a young woman; yesterday she had a double mastectomy. 

I am aware that we are here on this earth by grace, every day, and every day is to be cherished.  I wake thankful in the morning, and I fall at last to sleep, when I can no longer hold my eyes open at night, thankful still.  My parents are long dead, and as of a couple of years ago, so are all my aunts and uncles on both sides of the family.  I am the matriarch now, the one protecting the younger ones, holding back death until it is their turn.

And so I try to live neither in anticipation nor in fear, knowing that when I slip into either, I am missing the very moment I am living.  And because these moments are limited for all of us living creatures, I don’t want to miss a single one. 

Portugal?  It will be what it will be.  My part is to go with my eyes wide open.

 

Shame on You, McCain!

Posted on by

An advertisement linking Barak Obama to high gasoline prices is planned for national cable networks and is to play locally in 11 swing states, including three states particularly hurt by the economic turndown: Michigan, Ohio, and Pennysylvania.  The 30-second ad is called “Pump.”  (NY Times, July 22, p. A14)

The script for the ad reads as follows: “Gas prices.  $4, $5, no end in sight.  Because some in Washington are still saying no to drilling in America.  No to independence from foreign oil.  Who can you thank for rising prices at the pump?  (chant)  Obama, Obama.  One man knows we must now drill more in America and rescue our family budgets.  Don’t hope for more energy, vote for it.  McCain.”  The visuals support the message that Obama has caused high gas prices.

In the first place, no one who has studied the issue believes that increasing domestic oil production will be all that helpful to the U.S. in gaining energy independence.  In addition, both candidates have endorsed alternatives: wind and solar power, ethanol (Obama) and nuclear (McCain).  Many economists agree that McCain’s proposal for a temporary gasoline tax rebate would not give any substantial help.  And the cost of oil has been rising for years, because of various economic conditions and political influences. 

As the Times goes on to state, “‘Pump’ is misleading on nearly every substantive point.”  In other words, in plainer language, Senator John McCain, who must ultimately be considered responsible for this ad, is clearly and unequivocally lying to the American public. 

Even in this age of falling expectations, when cynicism is rife, in regard to politicians, I am shocked.  We should expect more from a Senator, a war hero, and a presumed candidate for the President of the United States.  We should expect integrity, we should expect truth.

 

“The Future of Human Civilization Is at Risk”

Posted on by

“The future of human civilization is at risk.”  These are words spoken yesterday (July 17) by former Vice President and Nobel prize winner Al Gore.  We need to take these words seriously.  But will we?

I look around in this most beautiful of days here in Portland, Oregon–72 degrees, with a slight breeze, and sunshine.  My beans and tomatoes are flourishing.  The squirrels are chattering in the big leaf maples that frame my craftsman house.  It’s difficult to believe on a day like this that human civilization is at risk. They’ll figure it out, we say.  There’ll be a techno fix–you’ll see. 

Actually, we can act to save ourselves.  But it will not be up to “them,” whoever “they” are.  It will be up to us–the people, that is.  Don’t expect political leaders to act.  Last winter, the House failed to pass a bill requiring utilities to produce 15 percent of their electricity from renewable sources by 2020.  Don’t expect business to lead the way.  Yes, there’ll be the few enlightened practices–but note how our automobile industry went blindly into this oil crisis with their SUV’s and pick-ups.  Remember that business is always chiefly concerned with the bottom line, and that bottom line is profit for the company, not the future of the earth.  And politics is run by big money.  Many corporations give generously to both parties and therefore exercise an inordinate amount of influence on the political decisions made in Congress. 

So it’s back to us–everyday ordinary citizens.  We have to provide the leadership that is not being provided by this country’s leaders.  Each and every one of us needs to become an activist.  “But what could I possibly do?” you might say.  “I’m just one small voice.”  Let me make some suggestions.

Join a non-profit group or church that is active in environmental work.  Tell your friends and neighbors the truth about how serious the environmental crisis is and how concerned you are.  Become politically active–write letters and send e-mails to your Congresspeople.  Support candidates who have a strong voting record on environmental issues.  Contribute financially to groups that are working to make a difference.  Make a point to conserve energy in your own personal life–not because your car-pooling or biking will save the world, but as a witness.  Others will notice, and follow.  When enough of us have turned in the right direction, change will be inevitable.

The rise in the price of gasoline has been the singular event that has most captured the popular imagination in regard to the crisis in the environment.  The stress on our pocketbooks has done what speeches, scientists, and prophetic environmentalists could not do.  It is a blessing in disguise. 

Gore said, “We’re borrowing money from China to buy oil from the Persian Gulf to burn it in ways that destroy the planet.  Every bit of that has to change.”  Gore’s plan is for the U.S. to do away with all carbon-emitting forms of electricity by 2018.  Gore has set forth a vision that calls us to greatness, and I believe that as a people we are capable of this greatness.  We are idealistic, inventive, practical, and resourceful.  We deeply and fervently want to do the right thing.  I pray that we will.  In time.

 

 

 

Never Made Pesto? It’s Easy!

Posted on by

Generally my blogs have to do with questions of some importance, such as the Presidential election or the Iraq War or the environmental crisis.  But sometimes I just chill out and tell a funny story or give a recipe.  Today we have a recipe–pesto!

Most of my readers have probably already made pesto.  It’s cheap.  It’s tasty.  It’s easy.  But I had not, until yesterday.  I think I lacked confidence–surely I would find some way to screw it up, I felt.  I had no idea just how simple it is to make pesto.  So for those of you who have never tried, now is the season.  Here is your fool-proof recipe.  I got it from a friend who got it from a food writer named Marcella Hazen.

                                               PESTO

2 c. packed fresh basil

1/2 c. extra virgin olive oil (get the good stuff–all olive oils are not equal)

2 T. pine nuts

2 cloves garlic

1 t. salt

Mix all ingredients in a blender or food processor at high speed, then pour into a bowl.  Beat in 1/2 c. freshly grated parmesan cheese and 2 T. freshly grated romano.  Beat in 3 T. butter, at room temperature. 

Cook the pasta as directed and turn it out into a large bowl.  Pour the pasta sauce over the pasta and mix well.  I lined the large round bowl of pasta with fresh, ripe tomatoes cut into eights.  It makes a pretty picture, and the flavor contrasts are excellent.  Have some more freshly grated parmesan cheese handy so that guests can sprinkle it on their pasta.

I would suggest some kind of pasta that the sauce will easily cling to.  This is where I fell down on the job: my pasta was too large–after it was cooked, it looked like overgrown spaghetti, and the sauce did not hold to it well.  Even so, the polite field of nine guests said they loved it, and several came back for seconds.

What could be easier than this?  If you’ve never made pesto previously, hesitate no more!